by Deborah Sawyer
(Lawrenceville, Ga. USA)
I am the mother with questions about visitation rights. In 1995, I had a pre-eclamptic twin pregnancy. I was on bedrest and hospitalized most of the time. They were born 10 weeks early - Shelby weighed 2.12 lbs and Courtney weighed 2.03 lbs.
Shelby did very well and came home at 4.lbs, Courtney developed an intestinal disorder called necrotizing endrocolitis that only premies get, they're not sure why. All signs & tests showed her surgery would be good and she'd be fine, I was there at Texas Childrens every day to visit her.
They were born 10-22-95, her surgery was 12-12-95, and it was bad, no intestines were left, it was all scar tissue. My ex and I rented a room in the hotel across from the hospital since it was an hour away from our house. My parents came down from ga. & we had a nanny to take care of Shelby who was home by then.
I went into shock after Courtney's surgery, went to the hotel and went to sleep. I woke the next morning in the middle of a panic attack thinking it was a nightmare. My ex left me alone saying he had meetings at work.
He was the boss, he could have cancelled, plus everyone knew what we were going through, but he left me alone to go across to the hospital. The minute I saw Courtney I fainted. They sent me back to the hotel to rest & eat something. The ex called the hospital & they told him I needed support, he called me, I told him I had passed out, yet he still was too chicken shit to return.
She lived until March 28th 1996, he maybe went to see her 4 times, I went everyday. He lied and said he
went after work. I would ask the Doc's the next day and they said no, he wasn't there. He then divorced me and stole Shelby, he set me up completely. He moved 3 times but I found him, after the 4th time, her 4th birthday was the last time I saw or spoke to my baby.
I've counted 526 seperate counts of contempt against him. I called and have written endlessly letters to the Atty Gen's office to no avail. He thumbs his nose at the law and gets away with it. I am now disabled, yet pay child support for a daughter I can't even reach on the phone.
I'm extremely depressed, disillusioned, have PTSD, insomnia, panic attacks, high anxiety, and the hopeless fear I'll never again see or talk to her & he's probably told her, I abandoned her and don't care, that will leave permanant scars on her psyche and it's so not true.
I would give anything to hear her voice, and let her know how much I think of her and love her and want to see her. I have a phone number on court documents on which is just an answering machine and noone ever returns the calls. is there any hope at all? I think he should serve some time or at least be fined for being in such contempt.
He simply doesn't think the law applies to him. he did this on his first divorce too. but ga. didn't put up with it - he was locked up 5 or 6 times and then it traumitized the child so bad he begged the therepist to make it stop. so the judge severed the adoption, saying "he disgusted her, and she found him to be a ruthless and pathetic father. Help, help, help. se