How do I Prove Father Has Dental Insurance In Child Support Case

by Grasiela Mariscal
(La Junta Co)

I have two children ages 11 and 10. My ex-husband is claiming that he has dental insurance on them and he is also getting credit in the calculation. It has been a year since the last calculation and I have yet to receive the dental cards. He is in the military and stationed in Arizona. He hasn't used his visitation for a year. I have contacted him and my local child support unit in Otero County. My case worker is Anabell Baca and she sent me a hand written paper that my ex-husband sent to her. The dentist office will not take a hand written paper with information on it. Also my children do NOT have military ID cards that they are entitled to. He refuses to send the paperwork needed to get them on base. They have had ID cards before and they expired. Now he is stating they don't need them. On the medical cards that I just received (after one year) clearly states they need the ID cards to be seen by their PCM. I have done everything possible except going back to court. How am I supposed to get these things? My children have not been to the dentist since 2006 when I had Delta Dental coverage on them. I was told that if he claims dental insurance and is getting credited for it in the calculation, I was supposed to receive the cards. If at all possible can you please send me any information on this subject?

Thank you,
Grasiela Mariscal
La Junta, Co 81050

Comments for How do I Prove Father Has Dental Insurance In Child Support Case

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What You Can Do
by: Child Support America Team Member


Thanks for your post. We recommend that you contact the military ombudsman program to see if they will help you in this situation. It also appears that you may need to file a motion with the courts to get your ex-husband to provide the proper information for the id cards and dental insurance.

Have you considered trying to get in touch with his superior officers on the base where he is stationed? We do understand that this may be difficult since you are no longer married to this gentleman. You can submit an answer via this post.


Military member give you advise
by: Anonymous

Speaking as a father and an exhusband also in the military. It can be a challenge to find the right answers. The best thing that you can do is try and have a friendly relationship to keep the lines of communication open between the two of you.
I can understand your fustration on your end, but more offten than not military members are told one thing about these types of issues and do everything within our power to make sure that our family's are taken care of.

It doesn't matter if we remarry and have more children. Your ex may not be getting the right answers on his end, and he is most likly giving you the info he is getting. When it comes to military dental ins. we all are at the mercy of the military to send the cards in a timely manner. If your ex is paying child support why would you not make sure that the two children have dental insurance and let your case worker know that they are covered? Why would you let them go for so long without seeing a dentist?
Another thing that you could do is price dental insurance and let him know and I know for a fact he would just pay out of his pocket to insure that Mike and Megan are covered.

What you are not thinking about is the fact that the military member is being taken out of state and is doing the best job that he can to insure that the two children are taken care of.

When it comes to seeing our children,BELEIVE ME we want to see them. There is a problem with being in Arizona and trying to travel back home.
You may not know this but military members have an enourmouse amount of stress put on them to perform in there job. This can lead to not taking any vacation time. Which in turn would keep him from travling home.

If you feel like you need to go back to court then thats what you need to do. I KNOW FOR A FACT that your childrens father loves the two of them with all of his heart and would push mountains over and part the sea to make sure that they are taken care of.

Remember there are two sides to every story. You have the opportunity and good fortune to see and watch the two children grow. As a Father in the military I would give just about anything for that... But we do not have a lot of choice when it comes to where we get stationed. Your ex probably feels that staying in the military is the best thing that he can do for the two children, given the current job opportunities outside the military.

Plus if he as a lot of time invested in the military he might be thinking about retiring. I think the best thing that you can do is make sure that you and him communicate. He should have your phone number and you should have his. He should at least be able to talk to the children on the phone.

Response to ex military member
by: Grasiela

The fact that an ex military member commented on this post is rather interesting. Due to the fact that my ex-husband has not seen the kids going on three years even though he comes to town at least five times a year shows just how much he really cares.

When my kids come across him in a store he acts as if he doesn't know them. Before he was supposed to provide insurance on the kids I had it and paid for everything. I have contacted the child support unit more than once about this. As many trips as he has taken to our home town in the past five years has been plenty of time for him to provide military ID cards.

For your your information in order for the kids to go to the dentist as a new patient under military coverage the sponser needs to provide the correct documents. Perfect example being he told me I myself could get the ID cards and get on base. This was incorrect and I took the kids to the base he said to take them to. I was turned away at the gate because the said sponser did not provide proper documents for me to get on base for the id cards.

As far as phone contact he has every right to talk to them. He doesn't. With that said actions speak louder than words in this case. Thank you for opinion on this matter. It is now in the hands of the court.

to the ex military member
by: Grasiela

If you know for a fact he would pay out of his pocket for the kids, why hasn't he paid half of the medical expenses that is in the court order? If you know this for a fact maybe you can enlighten me on the matter of his thinking? It would really help.

military member
by: grasiela

If you have any useful information please comment. It's clear you know my ex husband being you used my kids name with out me even mentioning them by names in my question. Did he tell you he hasn't spoken to the kids since his new wife kicked them out of her mothers house in pueblo? or that he let her curse at my children? Probably not.

If you want to know the truth you can read the police report that was filed on the matter. So what you think you know and what the truth is, are two very differnt things. Please don't post on here if you have no real experiance in this matter or if you aren't a part of the legal community..

For what is worth
by: Anonymous

Yes I am aware of your situation personally. I thought the reason to leave posts here was to request advise or leave advise? It sounds to me that you have no intrest in trying to have a conversation with your ex-husband in order to make sure that the two children are taken care of. If so you should contact him and make sure he is aware of what he needs to help with instead of going through other people.

If you can't then work with someone that can meadeate it sounds to me that you are very upset and with him and your anger is clouding your good judgement. Yes I know you. You are a good person, the only thing that I could recommend is having a clear line of commumication. I know the ex also he needs to be able to communicate with you, for the children. if your not allowing that, how do you expect for him to help?

by: Grasiela

It is highly impossible to have a conversation with my ex due to the fact that his wife is constantly yelling and cursing in the background. It shows how much he is willing to work with me when he point blank said not to bother him. Like I stated before, there is what you think you know and what the truth is. I asked for legal advice, not your opinion on what he tells you about me. You clearly have no idea the lack of parenting time he has had with the kids, which is all his choice. If you tell your kids you are going to call or see them, then you should.

Not make up excuses as to why you left town with out so much as a phone call. If you think you know so much about this situation, why is it so hard for him to get ID cards? It's not. He refuses to do so. Everyone makes their own choices. He has made his. With that being said, you can think what ever it is you like. But don't sit there and think you know what is going on because you don't. Like I stated in the previous comment it is now a matter for the court.

for what it's worth
by: Grasiela

So you really think I have never made contact with him? Never sent information that the doctors and dentist have sent me? I have done everything possible to get him to talk. For two years he did really good.

Came to see the kids, called you name it he did it. But three years ago that changed. Now there are no calls no letters no visits. Yes he has the number and the address. So don't think that I have not tried to communicate with him. I have.

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